Funny stuff about friends

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Cartoon of the Week for October 26, 2016

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October 26, 2016

Cartoon of the Week for September 7, 2016

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September 7, 2016

Cartoon of the Week for December 30, 2015

Cartoon of the Week for December 30, 2015

December 30, 2015

Funny Times October 2015 Issue

October 2015 Issue Cover

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Cartoons About …
Media . Anniversaries . Friendship . Home Improvement . Wildlife . and more!

Cartoons by: Isabella Bannerman, Lynda Barry, Clay Bennett, Bizarro, Harry Bliss, Ruben Bolling, Matt Bors, Dave Coverly, J.C. Duffy, Tim Eagan, Bob Eckstein, Samuel Ferri, Randy Glasbergen, Martha Gradisher, Buddy Hickerson, Nicole Hollander, George Jartos, John Kastner, Ham Khan, Keith Knight, Mary Lawton, Carol Lay, Chris Monroe, P.S. Mueller, Nina Paley, Joel Pett, Hilary Price, Andy Singer, Jen Sorensen, Barbara Smaller, Mark Stivers, Tom Toles, Tom Tomorrow, P.C. Vey, Bob Vojtko, Shannon Wheeler, Chris Wildt, Zippy, Adam Zyglis … and lots more!

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Cartoon of the Week for July 8, 2015

Cartoon of the Week for July 8, 2015

July 8, 2015

Funny Times May 2015 Issue

May 2015 Issue Cover

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Cartoons about:
Campaigns . Mothers . Baseball . Friendship . and more!

Cartoons by: Isabella Bannerman, Clay Bennett, Meg Biddle, Bizarro, Harry Bliss, Ruben Bolling, Matt Bors, Jon Carter, Dave Coverly, J.C. Duffy, Tim Eagan, Bob Eckstein, Benita Epstein, Randy Glasbergen, Martha Gradisher, Jeff Hobbs, David Horsey, George Jartos, Keith Knight, Mary Lawton, Carol Lay, Chris Monroe, P.S. Mueller, Joel Pett, Hilary Price, Jessica Pruett, Ted Rall, Steve Sack, Barbara Smaller, Jen Sorensen, Mark Stivers, Tom Toles, Tom Tomorrow, P.C. Vey, Shannon Wheeler, Matt Wuerker … and lots more!

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Funny Times July 2013 Issue

Funny Times July 2013 issue cover

Cartoons about:
Crap . Roadwork . Friends . Workouts . and more

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Cartoons by: Isabella Bannerman, Bizarro, Harry Bliss, Ruben Bolling, Bruce Bolinger, Dave Coverly, Derf, Tim Eagan, Bob Eckstein, Randy Glasbergen, Martha Gradisher, George Jartos, John Jonik, Ham Khan, Keith Knight, Peter Kuper, Mary Lawton, Carol Lay, Chris Monroe, Carlos Montage, P.S. Mueller, Jack Ohman, Rina Piccolo, K.A. Polzin, Hilary Price, Ted Rall, Maria Scrivan, Andy Singer, David Sipress, Jen Sorensen, Mark Stivers, Tom Toles, Tom Tomorrow, P.C. Vey, Shannon Wheeler, Matt Wuerker, Zippy … and lots more!

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Cartoon of the Week for April 20, 2011

Funny food computer death  cartoon, April 20, 2011

04/20/2011

Cartoon of the Week for December 25, 2007

Funny photo kids Maxine  cartoon, December 25, 2007

12/25/2007

Why Are My Friends Making Me Fat?

By Ray Lesser

A study recently published in the New England Journal of Medicine confirmed what I’d already suspected; my friends are making me fat. Researchers reported that obesity can spread from person to person, much like a virus. When a person gains weight, friends also tend to gain weight. Close friends are especially contagious and what’s worse, you don’t even have to live near them for their obesity to affect you. Even if your friend lives hundreds of miles away, if they get fat, your chances of popping the buttons on your trousers is tripled.

According to The New York Times, “The investigators say their findings can help explain why Americans have become fatter in recent years — each person who became obese was likely to drag some friends with them.”

Now look, friends, it was one thing when we were teenagers and you dragged me off to some muddy field to see an out-of-tune rock band with blown speakers massacring Bo Diddley songs. Sure, we all got sick from the communal free food, or maybe it was the communal pipe, but at least we met those nurses from Kalamazoo.

Then, when we were much older, you dragged me to that cigar and single-malt scotch bar, where we proceeded to spend ridiculous amounts of money to come home smelling so much like a guerrilla army that our wives made us sleep with the dogs. Not to mention that I woke up with a hangover so bad that I threatened to kill the next door neighbor’s 12-year-old kid for mowing his lawn.

Fortunately, no permanent damage was ever done (unless you count what happened in 11th grade to Mr. Fesselworth’s car). But this obesity thing you’ve dragged me into is changing everything I do and think. You invite me to your parties, and instead of having a case of beer and a bag of chips that gets eaten before I get there, like when we were younger, you’ve got a spread with six different kinds of French cheese, appetizers, dips, nuts, smoked fish, casseroles, soups, fresh baked breads and butters and then a whole other dessert buffet with pies, cakes, candy, ice-cream, whipped cream, coffee and cream. We talk and eat, and laugh and eat, and make music and eat, and drink and eat. Just when I think I’m finally finished eating, someone arrives with another steaming dish of au-gratin potatoes, or homemade brownies that we have to taste. Have you noticed that each friend who arrives late weighs a little more than the friend who came before them? In the parade of fat, fatter, fattest, the latecomers are taking longer and longer just to waddle out the door, and cram themselves into their increasingly bigger cars, vans, SUVs and super-sized SUVs.

And don’t try to tell me that my fat is my responsibility. It’s obviously your fault, because you got fat before I did. Or maybe it was Fred, or possibly Kevin, but I’m sure it couldn’t have been me. In fact, if we would all get together (my house, Saturday night pot-luck, the theme is Hawaiian Luau) we could decide who was originally responsible for getting us all fat, and nip and tuck this thing in the bud. Because the obesity researchers found out something else – if your friends lose weight, you tend to lose weight, as well. If Fred was the original fatty, we could grab him and ship him off to a fat farm until he works off all of our beer-bellies. If that doesn’t work we’ll make him try something more radical – pills, liposuction, stomach staples – whatever it takes to make us all skinny again.

Maybe we could talk this over at lunch tomorrow. There’s a place near where I work that serves the best onion rings I’ve ever tasted. There’s got to be something we can do, other than dieting, which we know never works. We’ve tried diets, and no matter how good they sound, or how high they go on the best seller list, they never work for us. The problem with dieting is that, instead of thinking about food less, you begin to think about it more. You become obsessed with food. You start counting and measuring every single calorie and morsel of delight. Meals last even longer because it takes time to prepare delicious low-fat, healthy food. You chew each bite 20 or 30 or 40 times to get every iota of taste out of it. You spend hours more ambling up and down the aisles of the grocery store, or the farmer’s market, or Benny’s all-you-can-eat salad bar, looking for every succulent delicacy that won’t make you fat. Even after all that, you’re still hungry. In fact, you’re always hungry, because you don’t wait until you feel stuffed to stop eating. So you’re incredibly starved before a meal, and still hungry when the food on the plate has disappeared.

Exercising never works, either. Exercising just makes you hungrier. After you exercise you can eat twice as much. Pretty soon, you’re exercising more, just so you can eat more. Gradually, slowly, unbearably, you finally lose one or two, or maybe even three pounds. Then you twist your ankle, or wrench you knee, and you can’t work out for a week. But you can still eat twice as much, because your stomach has gotten all stretched out from the exercising, and in two days you’ve gained back everything you’ve lost, and in a week you’ve gained 10 pounds. That’s what exercise does for you.

I know there’s got to be an answer somewhere. If we can’t get our fat friends to lose weight for us, maybe we just need to make new skinny friends. I wonder how many skinny friends it would take to counteract all the fat friends we already have? Help me figure this out first thing tomorrow at the coffee shop on Lee Road. They’ve got the most amazing sticky buns.