CALL NOW! 1-888-FUNNYTIMES (888-386-6984)

Bedtime

A person reading a story to an infant held in their arms: "and so the outdated and archaic dinosaur john henry rightfully fell dead in his tracks while the shiny new steam drill went on to great success & riches - his children's children eventually becoming the supreme beings/masters of the universe, though still cool and just regular guys. The end."
Cartoon drawing of mr and mrs potato head toys, asleep in bed, with the removeable teeth in a glass next to the bedside
Three panel comic of two characters in bed. The first says "Sometimes I just can't fall asleep at night & I don't want to take a pill" the second: "Why don't you try counting stuff like I do?." First: What do you count?" Second: "I count th' many times I've seen actors in movies or tv pretend to brush their teeth without toothpaste... I'm up to 1,763" First: "Yes, I've noticed that over th' years. Why do you supposed they do that? Would it make it harder to speak? Frankly th' whole phenomenon worries me--" Second: "Then, once i know you're worried, I fall asleep!"
Don't roll your ears at me
Any Problems?
A father reading his kid a book titled "fairy tales," saying "and gas prices rose because of president Biden."
Grandmother Breakfast
Middle-aged couple climbing into bed and looking coyly at each other. Caption reads: "let's synchronize our meds and meet back here when the time is right."
A parent reads to a small child in bed. The book is titled "Millenial Fairy Tales" and the caption says "And then they went and did work in a coffee shop and lives happily ever after."